My Light Bulb Moment
I stood in the shower and a dozen thoughts darted in and out of my head. I kept landing back on just one. My blog. This little blog…
I wanted to start writing again, but I didn’t know how. Or if I even should. So much has changed since I stopped.
Would people still want to hear what I have to say? What will people think of me? What if I fail and come out of this looking dumb? How much can I really handle?
I paused for a beat and did what I normally do when my thoughts become too much.
“Lord,” I looked up at the ceiling, “Should I be doing this again? CAN I do this again?…I wish you would please just pleaseeee give me a sign…”
I didn’t even finish my prayer before one of the three light bulbs that had been burned out for a few weeks in my bathroom lit up. It was brighter than ever. And it stayed lit throughout my entire makeup routine session that morning.
I went back later that day to check on it, and the light bulb was out again.
I don’t know about you guys, but I pray for signs ALL of the time. I don’t think I’ve ever gotten one as clear as that.
And here I am writing this.
And here you are reading this.
How wonderful is that? Really. Truly. Wonderful. <3
I got my first actual honest-to-goodness-light-bulb moment and I hope to do right by it. I hope to do right by those of you that follow this as well.
BUT before I start opening up and sharing my world with you all again I feel like we need a re-introduction of sorts. I also feel like you might have some questions, so I’m going to jump the gun and try to answer these for you so we can pick up right where we left off. Like old friends grabbing a cup of coffee together…except I’m going to be that friend that has had slightly more caffeine than the other and can’t stop talking…so feel free to leave me a comment after all of this with your thoughts as well.
To start, some of you may be wondering why I stopped blogging in the first place.
That’s a really good question, thank you for asking! For me, it wasn’t because I didn’t care about it…It was largely because I had a lot going on in my personal life and didn’t know how to handle it all. It’s funny how when we are stressed or overwhelmed or sad the first things to go are the things that make us happy and the things that make us who we are at our core. For me, I was too close to what I was dealing with to see the big picture. For a time I even made myself believe that I didn’t want this at all to make it easier. That didn’t work. I eventually got to a place where I started dreaming and wishing again.
And I feel ready to open up a little and share some of my experiences again in the hopes that someone who may be going through something similar could hear its message and feel less alone. The things that got me moving may be the things that could help you or someone else you know to get moving in areas of his/her own life. I’ve had a few experiences that I feel called to share and it is my hope that you ride along shotgun for the long road trip ahead of us.
What have I been up to in the almost 2 years I didn’t post for?
I feel like when I say that almost everything has changed, I really mean it.
Over a year ago Dan and I separated permanently. I’m now divorced. I won’t be sharing the intimate details of our marriage out of respect for him, and myself, but I will share the things that helped me pick up the pieces after the fall and what led me to the place I am in now.
But the divorce was really the start of all of my changes.
The day of my divorce was also the day that I was offered a new job doing something that was unlike anything I had done before. It was with many many tears that I said goodbye to the bank, which was one of the hardest things I’ve had to do. I loved my boss. I loved my co-workers, who became my friends. They got me through the hardest parts of my separation and I’ll forever be grateful.
I now work in Purchasing with some really great new people and feel like I am still learning things every day. It’s been challenging, but also exciting. I’ve gotten lucky all around in the coworker department in most of my jobs, I have to say. 🙂
I’m also living in a new tiny town with one of my dearest friends, Jenny, who I have known since Middle School. We call it our Chic Chick Pad which you will DEFINITELY be hearing about in coming posts. We have a lot of fun, stories, charts, laughs, and so many heart-to-hearts.
I’ve learned a lot this last year. I’ve fallen flat on my face this last year. I’ve grown as a person. I’ve had a lot (I mean a lot) of embarrassing experiences this last year. I feel like I have a new outlook on life. I feel like my goals and dreams are bigger than ever and I’m excited to start sharing these things with you guys again.
So, what’s in store for the future of this blog?
So many things!! For those of you that used to read this blog and are wondering what to expect now, I want to assure you I’m still keeping with my original mission of trying to become this ideal woman and always falling short. To be quite honest I had considered changing this whole blog and starting it new…but that almost felt like a disservice to it. I may have a new outlook on life, but I’m still the girl that is just trying to give it her best shot despite all of life’s setbacks.
I’m still going to have my life stories, funny moments, and fun things here and there. To be completely honest I am a little more limited in categories than I used to be. I no longer have a desktop, Photoshop, or as much time as I had prior, so you may not see many makeup looks or posts. I still love it and still want to share some of those things, but want to be upfront that it won’t be my main focus. Don’t get me wrong though, if you have a question or a look or want to see something, I would definitely love to hear it! Makeup is another fun and creative way we can express ourselves and I still use it daily in the morning. Sometimes it’s what gets me out of bed! I haven’t abandoned it, I just thought it was worth mentioning that it won’t be as frequent. When I do post about it, it would more likely be on my Facebook, Pinterest, or Instagram pages, so if you don’t already follow me there, please feel free to do so! 🙂
Throughout my life, I’ve met some AMAZING and INCREDIBLE people that I think we could all learn something from and my hope is to be able to spotlight some of those creative types here on my blog. It’s something new that I want to do and I’m very excited about it! I already have some ideas in the works!
I also have a big itch to travel and write about it. I want to learn more from people around me and see more of this big world we live in. Here’s to hoping that will be another fun thing coming up in this blog’s future. To write and travel. OHH would that be my dream!!!!!
And here’s where I wanted to say that if there is anything that you look forward to when reading my blog, or an idea you have, or something you are excited to read about, please please please leave me a comment here or feel free to message me! Yes, this is therapeutic for me and something I love, but I want you to feel a part of it too. I think all together we can create some pretty amazing things. <3
Okay. I told you I was going to be the chatty girl that had too much coffee. I hope you like what I have in store and I’m excited to start sharing again. I have SO missed this. Thank you so so much for reading!!
My roommate recently said that she met an older lady that always ended her phone conversations by saying, “Don’t let anyone steal your joy!” and I thought it was lovely. So here is your weekly reminder:
Don’t let anyone steal your joy. (Repeat as many times as necessary.)