When I vowed that I would do anything it took to get healthy again I did NOT imagine that just 4 days into that promise I would have to peel a blue shrimp…specifically a blue shrimp with legs!! ::shudders:: Now, some of you reading may have done this before and think it’s not big deal, but to this girl: it was. After the shrimp was de-thawed I noticed the little legs and gagged. I carefully slipped on my blue disposable gloves so that I wouldn’t reallyyyyyy have to touch it, picked it up by the tail, and stared at it for a moment before throwing it down and running to get Dan. I slowly led him to the kitchen to show him what I was up against. It was then that my caring and supportive husband paused for a moment, examined the shrimp himself from a safe distance, and said, “You wanted to do this. You’re on your own,” and then promptly exited the house to reside in the garage. Thanks again for that one Dan. “Although, he’s right.” I thought as I sucked it up and made a very tasty Green Bean and Shrimp Salad. I had to give myself the 174th “Dude, you got this,” mental-pep-talk ahead of time, but I was pretty proud of how it eventually turned out.
To start off I want to say how touched I was by the response of my last blog post. Hearing words like, “brave,” “needed,” and “inspirational” was just so empowering. I had no idea that so many of us felt the same way as I did, so for that I’m happy I forced myself out of my comfort zone and also wish I could hug you all. The blog post was even shared over 100 times, which is a LOT for me!! It also made me realize that I should touch more on the struggles and successes with you all in the hopes that someone can relate to it again or maybe be inspired by it. 🙂 This won’t be an every week thing (maybe every other week) but I had to do one this week because I felt like it was pivotal in my journey and lot happened!
I’m going to make a pretty bold statement and say that right now I want to be healthy more than anything else in my life. That’s how I feel inside and out and what I keep reminding myself of every day. I want this so badly I get emotional thinking about it, but it also drives me more than ever before. I’ve given myself a few months time frame with a goal to work toward and I don’t plan on stopping until I get there. I mentally was not in this state before, but after that last blog post something clicked and I’m better for it. Last time I lost weight I HATED the old me, the large and unhappy me. I would look back at pictures of myself with disgust and write “the old Anna” off. Not this time. I realized something that I should’ve seen before this week. The “old Anna” that I despise was the Anna that made the hardest decision of all, and that was to change. The old me had to work SO hard at first trying to learn new things and find out how to ever go about trying to lose weight. The old me had the MOST weight to carry around and the hardest push ups to do and the old me was the first one to say no to food that wouldn’t get me where I wanted to go. I need to love the old broken me most of all and not forget her and what she wanted most. I feel like that was my first biggest realization, I need to not hate myself even now and especially going forward. No, I’m still not happy with how I look, but I need to be kinder to myself and not mentally beat myself up to the point of immobilization over things I can grow to do. ♥
The second thing that I’ve learned this week is that saying “no” to things like a big snack after work or another serving of food is slowly getting easier. Especially if i remind myself of how much I want this. I don’t feel regret for sticking to my calorie range the few times I went out to eat this week where as before I would have. Even though I was saying no in the moment, I was really actually saying yes to a better life for myself. The first time I had to say no was pretty hard actually. We were watching the Packer game this past week and beers were-a crackin’, which is almost a habit here. I’m TOTALLY not opposed to drinking, but it was the end of a day were I didn’t plan any calories to spare, so I didn’t have one. As soon as I decided not to drink the beer and have my stress release tea instead, I became so happy about it where as before I would most likely be sulking. It was an unexpected and welcomed feeling and became the first of many no’s that grow easier and easier.
Since starting up with my food and exercise game plan, which I will share a bit of later on in this post, I have been INCREDIBLY sore. My body isn’t used to working out as much yet and it shows. It took me a good 2 minutes to try and shimmy out of a bench at a restaurant after our double date with my sister. After they all got out of their seats and walked to the door I struggled to scoot out of my inner seat with my suitcase-sized purse in tow. After a minute of realizing I wasn’t behind them, Dan walked back into the restaurant to find me as I was just getting out of the bench. “Are you okay?” he asked. “Yeah….” I replied with my dignity barely intact. When I got to the front of the restaurant my sister was holding the door. “What took you so long?” she asked. “Uh…My purse got stuck…” I lied trying to hold on to my last shred of decency. On the car ride home I thought of how ridiculous it all was and then laughed about it and had to tell Dan. To Amy: Sorry I lied, but I guess I didn’t want to look pitiful to my little sister. Guys, I’m very sore this week and feel like a grandma. God forbid I drop anything on the floor and have to bend over to pick it up. The struggle is real.
Speaking of struggles…I recently purchased some more chocolate protein powder and thought I’d try out one of those shakers for an on-the-go snack. Note to self and to others: Make sure the lid is completely tightened and closed before you shake that thing like there is no tomorrow. It. Went. EVERYWHERE! AND it happened right before work while I was in my work attire. Shout out to Hayley for telling me it looked like I shat myself. Well, that will never happen again. I’m learning guys.
After all of this in one week I’m so happy to report that I’ve lost 6 pounds!!! SIX!!!! I still have a long way to go, but that number is huge for me. I know I’m more than a number on a scale, but to have the scale actually reflect my hard work is rewarding and motivating for me. My Bodyshred program did not come in the mail yet and I don’t plan on starting that until after I run my 10k at the end of this month. I want to give my running the attention it deserves and the new program the full attention it deserves as well. So last weeks workouts went like this:
Thursday: Treadmill (4 miles) and food shopping
Friday: Jillian Michaels Body Revolution 30 min. workout (Front of the body)
Saturday: Treadmill (4 miles)
Sunday: Jillian Michaels BR 30 minutes (Back of the body)
Monday: Treadmill (4 miles)
Tuesday: Rest day
Wednesday: Jillian Michaels BR 30 minutes (Front of the body)
The DVDs are only 30 minutes and so doable, especially since I had to get up around 5am on three of those days to make sure it got done. Another HUGE factor in my loss was my food. I made a list, shopped, and prepped my food when I could between 2 different set days. I froze several things and have backup items for when I have less time or energy to cook. It was a big food prep day but that works well for me and leaves me only fully cooking one day a week and only mainly doing all my dishes on that day as well. I know that different things works for different people, but this personally helps me out a lot and was a habit that I used to have and need to learn again. I took some pictures of all of the stuff that I made so you can get idea of how I ate this week:
Okay, that really was long. Like I said though so much happened this week I had to share! How are you all doing with your goals? Any successes or struggles? Comment down below and we can laugh or plan this out together!!