“If I’m gonna take a freezing cold shower in the pitch black I’m at least going to have a shower wine,” I resolved as I headed toward the kitchen with my huge LOVE marquee sign tucked underneath my arm. I set it down before I grabbed my electric wine opener and prayed that even though the power had been out for about 7 hours already that the charge would work as normal and uncork my Cabernet with no effort at all. I wasn’t holding my breath. Earlier that day was when I heard the unfortunate “BOOM!” and all of the things that I rely on had shut down completely. At this point I still held on to my optimism. No Internet. Alright, fine. I’ll use my phone. Hour 4 was when my phone battery died. Hour 5 and a half was when my Kindle that I was reading from started to die. Hour 6 was when my laptop battery that played the background music in my otherwise silent house died. Hour 6 was also when I forced myself to do a workout that I made up myself with the blinds wide open, which are both things I had never done before. Seeing the WE Energies man walking in my yard past my window as I was on my 9th burpee sent my heart in a tizzy and I decided that I should probably start lighting candles in my house while I could still see. Plus the scare he gave me sent my heart rate higher than that 10th burpee could ever do. A BURPEE. Hour 7 was when my spirit broke, hence the wine. We were all set to see the new Superman movie and I was needing a shower, especially after that workout, before we left. I held on to the hope the entire day that the power would turn on before that moment so I could: 1.) see what I was doing and 2.) not have to take the coldest shower of my life due to the fact that we have a tankless water heater that went out right along with the power. I had no such luck.
The house was getting pretty chilly during our outage and that first sip of the red wine slid down my throat and left my cheeks feeling warm. Finally something good. I gave myself the mother of all pep talks before I took another big gulp of wine and stepped into the shower. As a kid, did you ever play that game where you’d throw pillows or things on the ground and pretend that you were walking over hot lava and if a body part touched the carpet you’d pretend die? I was an adult playing this game except the cold water was the lava. One thing I learned that day was that I am getting pretty good at my backbends. To get my hair wet I leaned so far back that I was shaking. Getting my hair wet was fine until my head felt like I had brainfreeze ALL over. I almost started to cry before I woman-ed up and got it done. The moment that I finished and turned off the water I felt as though I had accomplished some great feat. I was proud. I was proud until I realized that I might have to go to the movie with soaking wet hair due to my hair dryer not currently being able to plug into anything. Duh. I stepped out of the shower to towel off and I KID YOU NOT the power turned back on. Of course!!! Of course it did!!
Although in the moment I was pretty upset about the progression of events I can definitely laugh about it now. It’s hard to see the humor when you’re still in it, which brings me to the real reason I wanted to post this week. I’m coming clean, guys.
I’m gonna come right out and say it: For the first time since I started my journey to becoming healthy I haven’t exercised a SINGLE day last week. The whole week. Monday through Sunday. No, this is not something that I’m proud of. On the opposite end this is not something that’s also keeping me up at night because I’m so disappointed in myself (although I’d be lying if I didn’t say I wasn’t a little…) As the constant internal self-observer I feel like not all is lost and I learned several things this week that I feel the need to share to those that might be feeling similar so maybe they can take something from my experience as well.
First off, I feel like I need to explain what led up to this decision. Was there any one big moment where I said I’m not going to workout all week? No, not really. I think with all things it was a bunch of small moments that added together and timing that made this happen. I didn’t even set out not to fully workout it just started and I went with it. “Maybe I just need a break,” I thought with half conviction. It didn’t feel like something I deserved or wanted, but it happened.
Just like the power outage my week started out hopeful and optimistic but as the days went on I kept taking on last minute plans and not placing priorities on my workouts. By Day 3 I had convinced myself that I was just tired, and maybe I was. I slept a LOT. Day 4 was when I felt like I blew the week. I still paid mind of what I was eating but by Day 6 that started to go out the window as well. I had cake TWICE that week, guys. Ice cream cake. It was dang good too. Boy do I hate writing about this which is why this blog is a week late, this isn’t the fun part, but it’s the ups AND downs. I need to be honest with you and myself.
Just a few days before this hiatus was when I discovered that I lost another pound finally after a very long static state AND I could finally fit back into one of my favorite workout shirts that I used to wear: “Oh My God Becky.” haha I love that song.
Yet, with seeing some progress the old demons crept in my head telling me that I wasn’t making progress fast enough, I’m not good enough, and that I should give up. (Won’t these dumb voices just go away for good already?!)
The week before this I started to believe that my progress wasn’t good enough so I cut more calories and added to my schedule…and guess what? I got burned out. That’s why this never works for me, so I’ve learned over and over again. So here I’m gonna post about how I was feeling in that week of no workouts.
How I felt the Week I didn’t Workout:
- The first time I actually decided to take the week off I felt a little happy, like I was doing myself a favor. Nope. Nope. Nope.
- My energy levels were drained. I did sleep a lot.
- My motivation for other things started to dip as well, I felt like I was failing and that transferred in my thinking in other areas of my life.
- My self-control waived way more. When I exercise I’m more mindful of how I fuel my body and with what. Once that left me I started to ignore the caring part of me slowly.
- My anxiety heightened. I become so much more insecure when I feel that sense of failure in other areas of my life, imagined or not. It makes me question myself and other decisions more. Not good.
- I didn’t like what I saw in the mirror. My self-love was dipping and that’s the last thing I need.
- Where did my little muscle go? Yep. Thought of this everyday.
So to sum this all up: I felt pretty crappy.
Although maybe I needed to feel crappy to really remind myself of why I did this in the first place. Often I will read my initial blog about trying to become healthy to remind myself of the low point I was in and how I do NOT want to get there again. I feel like this was a reminder for me. Like I said before, not all is lost…for me or for you that are reading this and feeling similar. We can still come back from this little setback.
You know what else happened that week I didn’t workout?? I found new sources of motivation no matter how much I didn’t feel like it which is just as important to share with you all. Not every one of these might be something that works for you or is possible, but it can help get the wheels turning!
After the Week I didn’t workout I found
Sources of Motivation by:
!. Downloading some new songs that really pump me up for a workout. “I Dare You” by Shinedown is one of my favorites. It gets me good and mad and motivated. Go ahead and update that playlist.
2. Focusing on the reason that I started in the first place. It’s been 6 months since I started and sometimes my goals get lost which is the best time to revisit them.
3. Getting myself a new workout shirt. I’ve said this before, but nothing really gets me excited for a workout than wearing a cute new workout shirt! The one that I ordered was this cute number found at www.fitlikeflint.com. It says “Let’s Talk About Sets” (hehe) and I’m in love.
4. Examining what is working for you and what isn’t. I temporarily wanted faster progress and it ended badly. Slow and steady progress that’s not weight-loss based works best for me, but that’s not always the case. Do what works best for you.
5. Finding a new program. As some of you know I have been doing the Jillian Michael’s BodyShred DVD program which gave me great success and I do think so highly of it…BUT I have been doing it over and over since September of last year. I was getting tired of knowing what was coming next so I’ve been searching for something new to do which was part of my burnout. I finally found a good program that I like so far even though it’s early on. It’s one of the SEVERAL free programs from Bodybuilding.com. It’s called Clutch Life: Ashley Conrad’s 24/7 Fitness Trainer. It’s a 28 day program that has a video for everyday and minimal equipment. There’s a lot of stretching and I don’t know what I’m doing Day-to-Day (I’m only on Day 5) so it’s new and exciting!! Plus, she helped make Bradley Cooper’s abs for the A-Team movie and has that circuit on there as well. I love it!
6. Letting others know that you are burned out and need help. This is something that I didn’t do until now, but I’m holding myself accountable for this reason.
7. Signing up for a small challenge or something new to get the excitement back into working out. I’ve started running again occasionally because I really used to like it. AND I’ve added a little yoga again. I’m going back to the things I’ve loved in the first place so I don’t fall off. It’s okay to change things up or go back to things if you like them!
8. Planning a mini vacation to be able to show off your hard work! Now, this isn’t always feasible but it could be something as small as a swimming and picnic date at a local lake in the summer OR it could be something like planning the *honeymoon* that you’ve always wanted and took 2 years to officially do. Yep. The second one is me guys! Dan and I are finally going to take our honeymoon somewhere warm and on a beach!! If that’s not future motivation I don’t know what else is!!
9. Spicing up the old recipes. It’s easy to get sick of the same old same old which is why I love Pinterest and other recipe sites that make old things new again!! I cannot talk about this without giving my girl Kelley’s fitness page a shoutout here: FitShaped with Kelley. She has a couple of new recipes with the protein powder that I HAD to have because of her. A protein powder PUPPY CHOW recipe guys. I tried it at the Arnold and it was amazing.
10. If you have any other ones feel free to share here!! We could all use a little love and motivation sometimes!! =)
If you are still reading major hugs to you =) If anyone else is feeling burned out hopefully this reaches you and sends a little hope your way! It’s such a hard thing to overcome but I know we can do it. Remember: Baby steps. And we’ve totally still got this!! Everyone has slip ups and different phases in life but how we pick ourselves up and move on is what matters. It’s never too late. <3
Hope this finds you all well!!!!!